Do you ever wake up and just wonder, how the hell did I get here. Yeah I mean, if anyone really sits down and looks everything over, I'm sure he question is answered easily enough. So then the question turns from how did I get here, to Why am I here.... or even Why Me? I guess all of these question are created by our subconscious minds to force our conscious minds to either motivate or evaluate. - Now I know nothing about what I just said is new, many others have gone through these exact thoughts and handled them with a far greater talent for articulation then I will ever. Yes, alas any original idea I have ever had is scribbled in some note book and packed away deep in an ocean of moving boxes. - So anyway back to the point; I'm at one of those times in my life where such questions keep coming up. Thank God - I know I'm not the only one, still those I know with similar problems know either they now have to motivate or evaluate, one or the other. Lucky Ya'll. Me? I'm not really sure which way to go here, which course of action to take on. And not to sound lazy, but I'm afraid it's both. Which is physically and mentally exhausting. *sighs* I swear I'm not lazy. - It's just that I'm already swamped, with other stuff... alot of other stuff.

Anyways, On to something so much more worth while.

Constatine. My god, It's was worth the wait.. even though I wasn't really aware that it was even past the 'some day' category. Still even if I was, I would have been happy enough to wait years, if you've seen it then you know. If you haven't then turn off you computer and catch a showing ASAP. Reeves is sooo good. I almost forgot this was the same hottie who gave us the most excellent adventure and then go one many years and movies down the road to deliver us the WHOA that finally killed the Joey Lawrence (sp?) WAAHHHOOOAAA!
There is so much I want to say about the film... But I don't want to give even the slightest bit away. Though when the line "YOU KNOW" comes up when some of the characters are discussing the difference in Knowing and Believing in God. I mean just on a real stray thought - Is something Like FAITH devoid of it's glorious value, when it's remembered in almost a text book sticky note in a file cabinet fashion, rather then practiced?
This particular thought hits me hard, because I sometimes wonder, more now in my current life then ever - wonder if I haven't so fully turned my religious study, into a quest for knowledge that I have fully become a student of faith and human nature, rather then the curious, thirsty Christian I originally began this entire life style as.

Honestly if your a deep enough person, or twisted enough, this movie like all most all the HellBlaizer comics - will get your mind cranking out some seriously interesting and of course sometimes depressing stuff.

Anyways, on with life -

Donovan has purchased an African Grey Congo - It's day four and it's been interesting. As well things with Donovan and I seem to be improving. I'll say no more, because like with everything else in my life, I'm still waiting for everything to fall from beneath my steady balanced feet.
And tomorrow it's back to job hunting. Mostly heading out to try for a job at Sullivans. Yeah, Yeah I know, not really my style, but the cocktail waitresses are aloud to wear fishnets and other hosiery that I am so found of - so maybe it is just my style.

Wish Me Luck... I'll need it.