2005 ( almost here )

So the links don't work...
I'm stuck with a haircut I hate...
My love life is a roller coaster, and not in the best of term....
I'm not losing the weight as well as I had hoped....
Job is good, but I missed work today, because I never speak up when i should and sometimes when we are unselfish, in the presence of those who are very selfish, in some sick and twisted way, we become far more selfish then they...
Oh, and this web/blog/site thingy sucks.. not at all as I had intended it to be. So If I Don't Have It Up To Speed by say.. the end of March, then it's bye bye blog for this girl.
In the mean time back to me.

I know I haven't been posting much, but here's something to clear my head and bring some of us to a decent speed.A few weeks back I walked into Comic Book Orphanage.. first time since ... wow I think May? The guys who run it are great, had everything still on hold and, yes despite the large sum, I should have it off by the end of February. Just have to get the Pearl, finally up to speed. I took Donovan with me.. and well as far as all that is going, well more a bit later in the post. Anyways it felt good to go back to the shop. I think I've been going to them for like 5 years now? need to start going again every week like I used to it. It's fun, and I get to walk around for a few hours, looking at the other shops in the center, and it clears a girl’s head. Besides, I have very few places I can go anymore, where there are always at least 2 smiles to greet me.

Job is great. I hope I still have one tomorrow. I mean they are flexible, and it's just a cool.. yet some what shady place to work for, but not like that's new for me. It's also close to some schools.. yeah, still thinking about it. I feel like I have no real drive. I mean you would think the idea of a better career and life would be enough, but ya'll know me, I need a reason - and currently, I really don't have that 'reason'. I mean it usually takes someone I care about, who cares that much about me. Or cares that 'way' about me. Oh well.. one day I'll have that reason, or I'll snap out of it.. or whatever.

Family life, is allot like a post card life. Sorry about that to any family that may be reading this. I aim to help recover some of my family closeness after I finally move out and not living between places and struggling to beat traffic, all the f***ing time.

Love life? Oh, my. I don't even know what I'm doing anymore. And of course with that said, obviously the 'why' I'm doing it slips me from time to time. I'll be twenty-one on the above date ( jan 19 ) at which time, I need to join a gym, after all October is coming again. Find a bar.. or learn to love clubbing. Either way, I need a social life I can stand in alone. I need a circle and I need one fast. Mardi Gras is coming. DJ, likes to celebrate from balconies.. geee! Can't Imagine why... And I, welll it would be my first year without the family.. I'll do my best not to end up as another Girls Gone Wild after thought. And then there is Rodeo Houston. DJ, hate concerts and large crowds... never mind he's at a party right now at this very moment. I'm here alone, because I have work.. and even though I don’t understand it, but something about attention he needs, that he can't get when I'm near.. or well something less screwed up sounding then that. Seriously folks, I'm not upset. I'm a drag.. well I'm F***ing top notch, goddess of the night in my world, Smoking diva, but in his world, his circle... not so much. So I understand, and when I'm old enough to actually order my own drinks.. in just a few short weeks, I'll be more then happy to party at night, we'd be the perfect couple... well accept for the fact, it may be at different parties. Oh Well.. Anyone who says I'm not a hard one to hold has never dated me. So anyways, I'm in the market as it were, for some Mardi Gras and Rodeo Boys and Girls, to hang with. Because I live for music, and I have no interest, of standing on a balcony-watching girls 'compete' for beads, when I can In the crowd, ally way or bar - earning my own.

The best thing ever? Or the sweetest thing about my birthday this year? Though it may fall on a Wed. It's still the day after pay day. And I can work with a hangover >:]

So G'Nite BOYS and girls.

Whatever Tomorrow Brings... (and oh the possibilities) Spiral Out... (I fully intend too) Wave On.... ( bring it on...)

Next Year - Will Rock

Time To See Who's Who and What's What.

True Fans of The written Word, Lend Me Your mouse's. The Day some of us Have Been Waiting For... Now If Only theses Links will work....

(if Not, Try Finding The Trailors Else Where....)

CONSTATINE

and....

BATMAN BEGINNINGS

and.. I haven't seen this one, but should be promising...

ELEKTRA

I'm not Venting - By venting.... (12/9/04)

Oh My God...

I want to vent... I want to Vent soooo bad.

Why can't I vent... this, this BLOG is my sanctuary. I should be able to vent!

But I can't. Why can't I?

Relationships. Now, not necessarily a 2D one. I hope It's not a 2D one... maybe it should be - a bit simpler in the long run. MAYBE it's the source of my 2d ranting... which I will fix the typos and finish. For now...

Now, I want to vent. I can't vent. Want too... Need Too almost... Can't.

A relationship. My God... I was spoiled. I'm trying to forget what that's like. I mean it's perfect - was perfect. I don't expect that... I never did before, I wont even ask that.. it would be insane.

Nice, but insane.

sacrifice.

*sighs*

I'm a thinker. Maybe that makes the difference between me and normal girls. I think.. make sure my problems are, well - really the problems. No sense on blowing off over the first emotion and thoughts and whatever, blowing up with the first, with you initial reaction - I mean slow down. Right? Think it through.. right?

I feel like I'm gonna be sick. So I'm not normal. So what?.. Exactly my point. So, I'm not Normal? What's normal, and if you can peg it as the classic girl friend bull shit - more so in this day of age. Why is that something so to have? But hey! What do I honestly know?

I'm just trying to not vent, by.. well venting.

Alright. So this relationship isn't to defined. It's all about the company anyways... SO I'm told.

Maybe it's time to begin defining.

Wait! There's More! (12/06/04)

Alright, so I promised some human nature stuff, right? And as if anyone is still reading this - I haven't really delivered. I even went a step further and picked a more precise topic on 2D relationships.. lets face it people; We Have All Been In One, and Don't look now, because most people would agree ten out of ten people are still holding a 2D relationship with someone in some way. My guess would say the most popular 2D relationship is found between coworkers. Second most popular, are of course the type of people who are caught in everyday relationships, that are slowly moving in big agonizing circles, that will either end up broken off in an e-mail, or post it - for the more original thinkers or taken to the next level which of course is marriage; don't kid yourself, if you have spent the past 5 years engaged, and the 5 years prior to that as the 'steady couple' and no wedding date in sight, your probably in a 2D relationship. Taking the next step towards the alter, more so with great haste, or agonizing means to the 5 year end, are now a days, most likely to not even see that one year anniversary - though most bets are at least taken from the 22 month point on. That's right folks, when his type of 2D relationship reaches that point, odds are Divorce is not far behind... that is unless you chose to wait until your well into your late 20s to tie the knot - statistics are slightly more in your favor.
Then there are the few other lesser 2DR's. A stranged family could make for a good third, or you lovely neighbor's, for those of you stuck in one of the ranch-like communities. But I think we can all agree that Office life and Love life rule this subject.

So what do I consider a 2 D relationship.. hmmmm. Well you may have gotten a taste in the above. And I do promise ( sighs, yes there is that word again) a more indepth look into my twisted and misunderstood mind - full out with all the wonderful details that you could spend all day wrapping your mind around, if you really have nothing better to do. And honestly on a side note, I can't completely say this is fueled by completely unrelated matters to my own personal life.. if I said that I'm sure it would be considered a fib and best. So I'll take another few lines to just rant about my life a bit,. before I really wedge myself between the old rock and hard place, just chew on the above, allow it to wet your appetite - for there truly is more where that came from, as if anyone is still reading and or cares.

Moving On! (momentary break - I assure you all) My job is good. Office work seems to suite me for now. Leaves me craving means to a higher education - who knows where that'll lead.
Love life is a bit rocky, but none the less inspiring >:]
Christmas shopping - well despite all the gifts I buy, the list hardly seems dented. And all the really big gifts are being pushed to the last minute. I hate the idea for delayed gift giving, but lets face it - It's not like I haven't unwrapped three or four CD's only to then unwrap the raincheck for my new soundsystem. - Still I'll try my hardest to leave no stone un turned, or store shelf un searched.
And as far as general social calendar goes... "I'm in the Market, as it were."
So H-Town, feel free to drop in and say Hi. If you know me, then you know my number.. if you don't then the E-Mails Sterben_84@hotmail.com Always interested in whoever's interested in this thing.

And as I said before, 2D relationships... more to come!

Whatever Tomorrow Brings.... Spiral Out.... Wave On

2 D relationships

It's gonna be one of those weeks. I can feel it now.

2D relationships. I'm may not get to put to much on here right now, but I promise you I'll post a great deal on it. I'm currently caught in the middle of a few. Some not so important, others very very important. Honestly it looks like I'm really getting my cravings to study human nature again.